Introduction

Lives Upended, Interrupted, and Restored

by Lance Isidore Catedral, MD

When we opened the call for articles for this special issue of The Filipino Internist, we wanted to create a safe and creative space for our pandemic stories. Having served in the front lines, we internists carry with us a wealth of experiences and insights. In the weeks that followed after the invitation, we were surprised by the number of emails that showed up in our inbox. We did not expect the excitement the Going Out issue would generate.

This is the first of two parts of the special Going Out issue. We will be releasing the second installment early in 2023. Upended, interrupted, and restored lives is the central, unifying theme of these pieces. Written with honesty, bathed in creative, descriptive and insightful language, these articles—essays, creative non-fiction pieces, and poems—bear testament to the writing skills and depth of insight of internists in our midst.

Dr. Glenn Grecia, Jr’s piece (“The Roller Coaster Ride”) opens the issue. In his article, he writes about his trip to the amusement park as pandemic restrictions were being lifted. His anxiety, which flares up minutes before his turn to ride the roller coaster, seems to mirror our reaction in the early days of the pandemic. He writes, “Would I open my eyes and face the world as it spun, or would I close my eyes and wait for the end?”

Dr. Shadrina Tahil-Sarapuddin (“The Most Uncertain Time of My Life”) shares her experiences, career change, and life lessons. She writes from Tawi-Tawi and Zamboanga City. In this deeply affecting article, she writes, “COVID hit me hard. I got infected and was accused of staging a coup for power-grabbing. It has been hard on all of us, and getting used to a new way of living does come with its challenges.”

Another writer from Mindanao is Dr. Saimah Lyn S. Mama (“Kailangang Lumaban”). Overwhelmed at having attended her first out-of-town, in-person conference in Baguio, she briefly writes about her dreams of pursuing subspecialty training and assures us, “I believe we will come out of this pandemic stronger.” She sends her dispatch from Marawi City.

Dr. Michaela Ann Gonzales-Montalbo (“Teleconferences and Teleconsults”) shares a scene from her home, where she and her husband, also a doctor, watch different medical conferences in their laptops. In this piece, she thinks deeply about the impact of technology in patient interaction.

Dr. Patricia Kaye B. Regalado (“Riding Tides: Finding Love in This Global Pandemic”) bears her heart out in this gripping, true story about her search for true love. This was the time when she went on hospital shifts as a fellow in infectious disease. Single doctors looking for love will find this piece instructive and inspirational.

Dr. Emmanuel II. G. Ruiz (“Fear of Firsts”) uses the imagery of war as he shares his story of being the only physician “in a state university with fourteen thousand breathing souls to care for.” He also writes about learning how to cook for his wife and sons, no small thanks to YouTube.

Dr. Michelle Angela Tan-Reyes (“I hope this virus goes away for good”) shares the story of her two kids who transitioned from online to in-person sports training. She also writes about her experience with teleconsultations.

Dr. Ella Mae Masamayor (“A Day with Mommy”) offers scenes from her bonding moments with her mother. In this piece, she narrates the painful toll that the pandemic has imposed on physicians and their families. Her words resonate with us: “Whatever horrors I would see in the hospital, I worried for my family at home.”

We also have three poems in this issue.

Dr. Elvie Victonette B. Razon-Gonzalez (“Grounding”) shares a poem she wrote “after heading to the mountain to ‘breathe.’” She takes us with her on her trek to escape, albeit briefly, and enjoy the wonders of nature.

Gabriel Lee’s “Is Surviving Living” is an honest reflection of the author’s resilience in facing each day, aware that he needs to deal with several struggles. Is that what many of us also feel? He writes, “I am surviving each day / That is how I am living / To be afloat and alive / Striving even if struggling.”

We conclude the issue with Dr. Buenaventura C. Ramos, Jr.’s “Ngayong Puwede Na.” The tone is one of longing and remembrance. The poem’s last four lines resonate with our collective pain and grief, and we thank the writer for articulating those emotions. As we read his poem, let us remember the many people we have lost during the pandemic.

“Sana kasama ka

Sana nandito ka

Sana…

Nandito ka pa.”

As we immerse ourselves in these creative stories, may we, too, find the courage to write and share our own.

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